Grow some girl-balls and come out already
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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