And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
