Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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