You work out of a Hotel?
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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