Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
