Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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