at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
