Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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