i think my mom watched the whole time
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
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