would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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