You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
