Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
