I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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