I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
