At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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