KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
