No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
