i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
