Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
