Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
They have beer where we have blood.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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