Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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