Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
I love you.
Bad choice
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