Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize