ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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