I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize
