The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
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Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
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For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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