I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Come see our sink grown plant.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
