That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
