So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
