At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
