Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
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My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
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Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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