he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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