listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
