a queef is a wish your heart makes.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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