you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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