If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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