You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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