Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
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