I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
