The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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