So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Randomize
