i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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