My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
