How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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