508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I just want to make out with him forever
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
