I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize