Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I'm at about main and main street
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Randomize
