I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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