so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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