NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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