my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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